This Was The Coloured Version of ‘Yo Mama’ Jokes

In Cape Town we don’t mess around with “yo mama” jokes. Here you say “jou ma,” and it’s usually followed by language your ouma wouldn’t approve of. With Yo Mama jokes, the idea is to describe someone’s mom in the most exaggerated, silly way possible. In the movie White Chicks there’s this funny moment where the characters go back and forth with “yo mama” insults. Go check it out.

 

Anyway, that’s for African American people. The brusse on the Cape Flats had their own spin-off. There’s no real name for our version. They usually all started with “Jou” (your in English; so Your-jokes?). And then you insult everything in someone’s life: their house, their car, their dog, where their outoppie supposedly works, and so on. It’s still a roast-off, but instead of just one target (your mom), you aim your insults at their whole existence.

 

Back when I was a kid in the 2000s we used these jokes to entertain ourselves. It was a competition really. A schoolyard skill. The game was to see who could come up with the best diss. It was never serious, though. You’d laugh, you’d get roasted, and then you’d fire back with something meaner. That’s how it worked. 

 

Can anyone still get away with these jokes, especially online? I think there was a time and place for them. These days, everything feels a bit different. People are more careful with their words, with everything going on in the online world and all the wokeness. That’s probably for the best. Still, here’s a little sample of those jokes we grew up with. Take them for what they are. A little laugh, a little nostalgia. No hard feelings.

 

1.

Your family’s so poor, the framed photos are all stick drawings.

 

2.

Your family’s so poor, the tikkoppe break in your house and leave money.

 

3.

Your family’s so poor, you ate cereal with a fork to save milk.

 

4.

Your family’s so poor, you have to take the trash in when the garbage man comes.

 

5.

Your family’s so poor, your shopping cart at the grocery store has a “For Sale” sign on it.

 

6.

Your family’s so poor that you window shop at the R5 store.

 

7.

Your house is so small, you can sit on the toilet and wash dishes in the kitchen sink at the same time.

 

8.

Your house is so small, the kakkelakke are paying rent.

 

9.

Your house is so dirty, I saw a kakkelak doing the dishes

 

10.

Your house is so dirty, even the kakkelakke have maids.

 

11.

Your house is so dirty, your trash gets up and takes itself out.

 

12.

Your daddy’s car is so old, it’s pulled by horses.

 

13.

Your daddy’s car is so old, it’s got square wheels.

 

14.

Yo mama’s so ugly, she tried to take a bath and the water jumped out!

 

15.

Yo mama is so ugly, she has to wear makeup to take a shower.

 

Which joke is your favourite?

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